Here's to the moms!

Sunday will be my first time to celebrate Mother's Day as a mom, but honestly, I have mixed feelings about it. I'm torn between being so excited and wanting to post a sappy post about how much I love my little schmoo and this new mom life, but not wanting to do that because I know the pain some people feel on this day. Yes, they probably have a wonderful mother to celebrate, yet their heart is hurting because they are not yet mothers or they are mothers to children who will never walk on this earth.

Last year, I lost a baby and went through surgery to repair my Fallopian tube in January. You would think by Mother's Day in May, I would have been over it, but I wasn't. Mother's Day was even harder, because it seemed like the support I had at the time had forgotten that I lost my baby; that I was actually a mom too, but my baby was in heaven. Don't get me wrong, I did have a caring husband, family, and friends, but it was still hard for me.  Looking back, it's almost like I expected my friends and family to know the hurt I felt, but that was an unrealistic expectation for me to put on them.

Should they bring up my loss or will that make me an emotional basket case? Should I stand when they ask the moms to stand at church? Do I pretend like losing my baby was no big deal, and I'm completely fine now? Should I forget about my first child because he was only 7 weeks old when his heart stopped beating and 10 weeks old when he left my body? I don't want to forget the pain or the fact that I am a mom to two babies, but only one is with me on this earth.  

I wonder if God allowed me to walk that path so I would be sensitive to others who are hurting. These women, who have lost babies or are walking through infertility, are close to my heart. I pray for these women regularly that their babies would come soon. I pray especially that when they see a pregnancy announcement or sappy mom post on social media that they will take heart in knowing someone cares and is praying for them.

So here's to you: the mom in the making, the mom whose babies are in heaven, the mom who doesn't think she can make it through the toddler stage, and the mom who is sad because her babies have all left the nest.  I thank God that He is with us in the happy times and in the hard times.  I pray that on Mother's Day this year you would be sensitive to those around you and not take for granted the blessings you have been given.  Happy Mother's Day!

Special thanks to my mother who was there for me when I lost my first baby and when I brought my second baby into this world.  I truly couldn't have done it without her love and support. I love you mom, and appreciate you so much more than I ever did before Rhett joined our family.